Between Cooing and College

Longer Days!

2009-02-05T22:24:00.002-06:00

I've just started noticing that the days are getting longer. Of course, this is a misnomer--our days are the same length all the time! But the time the sun is out and sky is light is getting longer, finally.

I do NOT like the dark days of winter. I feel cooped up and like I just cannot get enough done during the hours of light.

When the days FINALLY seem to get longer, it's like I'm taking a deep breath of fresh air. Speaking of fresh air . . . temps were in the 40's and 50's yesterday and today, and I think I smelled a hint of spring in the air!

I know there will be more cold days, and most likely more snow, before spring is here to stay. But now that we're in February, spring won't be long in coming.

"ME" Time

2009-02-05T22:11:00.004-06:00

Our trip to Denver was fun and successful . . . and you can tell it's been busy since then because I'm just now getting around to catching up on blogging.

I had a fun time in Denver. I had several days for just "me." We were in Denver for over a week, and the kids showed on two days, and sold their cattle another evening. Since there's nothing I can do (well, never LEARNED to do--by design, LOL!) with the cattle, and quickly get bored watching the others work on them, I stayed at the hotel except for the days the kids actually showed, or sold, their cattle.

I knew I'd have several days to myself, so took several plastic boxes of scrapbooking stuff and pictures along. It was WONDERFUN to spend DAYS scrapbooking, without the interruption of animals wanting into or out of the house, clothes needing to be washed, dried, folded, or put away, dinner needing to be cooked up or cleaned up after . . . you moms all know the drill!

There was a shopping complex nearby, with a WalMart, Sam's Club, and several restaurants. The first day were were in Denver I stocked up on snacks so I didn't have to eat "out" for every meal. I got take out once a day, and usually picked up something for Tim and the kids, too. By the time they got back from the show, they were usually tired and didn't want to have to go out again (although we did go out for supper twice while we were there). It was such a treat to not have to cook, and to eat food we usually don't get to enjoy--Panera Bread, a yummy chinese place . . . and already I don't remember what else we enjoyed.

The hotel had an exercise room, and believe it or not I ENJOYED having the time to exercise every day. I've resolved to save money for a treadmill, exercise bike, and/or elliptical machine. It will probably be quite a while before I can afford any one of them, but will be on the look out for used ones.

I was proud of myself for venturing out one day to an Archiver's--a huge scrapbook store. I didn't "need" anything, but needed some fresh air, and it was 70 degrees there! I Googled the store and directions for getting there . . . I'm usually not brave enough to drive anywhere I'm not familiar with . . . but that day I did it! I'm very "good" at going the wrong direction (I have NO sense of direction) or taking a wrong turn . . . I guess knowing that if I did that, "I" would have to solve it myself made me very conscious of where I was going and what I was doing, because I made it there and back without a wrong turn!

I want to encourage every mom reading this to TAKE TIME FOR YOURSELF! It makes you a better mom, person . . . better in every role in your life. NO ONE is going to say to you, "You've been working really hard--why don't you take tomorrow off? I'll take care of the kids, laundry, cooking, and so on; you just relax!" (If someone in my family said that to me I'd hurt myself falling over in shock . . . )

Anyway, YOU have to take care of YOURSELF--take the time to do so! And enjoy it like I did in Denver.

On Our Way!

2009-01-16T22:46:00.002-06:00

We are FINALLY on our way to Denver!

The morning started early, as Cody and Morgan left at 7AM to take Jenny to the kennell before they went to school.

I spent the morning frantically trying to get my to-do list for the morning done. It mostly consisted of packing (clothes, NFT work stuff, and scrapbooking stuff), but also included a trip to the bank and a variety of around-the-house tasks (watering the plants, getting all the cats out of the house, etc.) It took me until the kids got home around 12:45 to get everything done, but I did!

We left at 1:41PM and had an uneventful trip to Fort Morgan, Colorado. We stopped here for the night; some of the cattle, that will be checked into the show next week, are staying at a ranch near here. Cody will be clipping them this weekend.

The trip was actually quite fun. It was nice to be sitting down after such a hectic few weeks. We played a game of "name that tune" most of the way. Cody and Morgan's rules are that a point is awarded for naming the tune, and another for naming the band/singer. If we don't like the song that's being played, we can search/scan for another.

We all started out pretty even; predictably, Cody and Morgan are best at "modern" songs, I'm best at 80's music, and it's pretty much a draw when it comes to country. We were all pretty much tied when Morgan fell asleep. Cody and I continued playing, and talked a whole lot about not much of anything for several hours. It was really nice to spend that time with him.

Oh--and he drove the whole way! I was relieved as I didn't get to sleep till after 2:30 AM and was fighting a headache all day. He's a good driver! It was nice not to have to do that.

After we stopped for gas and snacks, Morgan was awake and we all began playing "name that tune" again. We all stayed pretty even for awhile, but then Cody quickly named four songs AND the singer within a few minutes. By that time we were close to town and ended the game.

Now we're relaxing in the hotel room, and looking forward to getting to Denver tomorrow!

Mom Worries

2009-01-15T21:39:00.004-06:00

I talked with several mom friends this week, and the topic seemed to be "worries about our kids." What struck me is how our worries differed.

One mom was worried that her son is taking life too seriously. He was offered a full-time job this summer--a VERY full-time job which, while a wonderful opportunity, would prevent him from taking college classes and spending much time with family and friends before he goes to college . . .
One mom was very worried about her son who is NOT taking life seriously, failing several classes, and might not graduate.
Another mom worried that her son is dating too many different girls . . .
And a different mom worried that her son isn't interested in dating.
Another mom worries about her daughter, who is hesitant to drive after a recent accident . . .
And another mom is worried about her daughter who doesn't take driving seriously enough.
Yet another mother is very concerned about something she found in her son's room.

It struck me that we moms can always find something to worry about, no matter what age our kids are! I guess the "worry muscle" is just built into moms. Seems just a few days we were worried about how much (or little) our kids ate (or slept). Today the issues are much more serious.

The above worries, of course, are very valid worries. But I know I have worried way too much in the past, and that took some of the joy out of what I was doing. I have been blessed with friends who allow their kids to do things that I might have been apprehensive about. One of my friends let her daughter, who was about 12 at the time, go all the way to Australia for TWO WEEKS--WITHOUT HER MOM!

Her attitude toward letting her daughter take advantage of that opportunity helped me to look at things differently. Yes, I still worry when my kids drive somewhere (thank goodness for cell phones so they can check in when they get there!) or go with a bunch of other kids . . . but I realize that it's part of growing up and I cannot deprive my kids of opportunities because of my worry.

Our pastor says something when a child is baptized that hits home with me as my kids get older. He says, "We love our childre, Lord, but we know that You love them even more." I cannot imagine anyone loving my children more than I do, but I believe that God has that capacity for love, and with that, it's much easier to put them in His hands.

Lists, Lists, and More Lists

2009-01-15T21:20:00.002-06:00

It's been a very busy week!

The kids and I are going to Denver for a few days, and I've been scrambling all week to try to get done what I need to before we go. When I was a kid, my mom always made us clean before we left so we could come home to a "clean house." I like to come home to a clean house (at least clean until we start unpacking) so try to do the same thing.

I had some business things to do for the Nebraska Family Times--get the billing out and give a presentation for the youth group, which is going to sell subscriptions to the Nebaska Family Times as a fund-raiser (for more about that check out www.nebraskafamilytimes.blogspot.com).

I'll have a bit of free time while we're gone and have long-planned to spend it scrapbooking! I decided that it would be the perfect time to go thru all those files of pictures I've taken over the last almost two years, and order prints. Yep, almost 2 years with the new camera and I've had actual pictures developed . . . twice. In the midst of this my computer decided to cause problems . . . there were some hair-raising moments when I was afraid I'd have to delete my entire photo program, and NO, I hadn't backed up my pictures! Thankfully it straightened out long enough for me to get prints ordered!

I just realized I did not get the pics from one file printed . . . I think there are over 200 photos in it and the thought of having to go thru all those pictures, delete the duds, and order the good ones is just too overwhelming for right now--they'll have to wait!

I also worked at my nursing job two days, had a haircut and eyebrow wax, and decided it was time to color my hair again (I love being a redhead!) {now you know all my "beauty" secrets!}

Needless to say, as a Type-A somewhat-compulsive-person, I made many lists. I made lists of what I need to pack--yes, that's plural, "lists," (scrapbooking stuff, clothes, books, NFT things to work on) and yes, still "need" to pack. (I think it's going to wait till morning!). Stuff I need to do around the house before we leave (yep, still a few things to do). Nebraska Family Times things to do (almost done with those).

I went to Columbus several times, and to Genoa several times, and made lists of things to do on each trip (pick up photos, deliver papers, mail ad packets, deliver a birthday gift to a friend, drop off library books--and more). I think I feel some sort of control when I make all of these lists, because I've actually found several of the same lists (on different pieces of paper, in different rooms), and when I was at work fretting about what I needed to do, I made more lists on sticky notes!

I actually kind of like these busy weeks, although I wouldn't want them all to be like this! I feel very productive when I've crossed most everything off. And it was a good week--I got to see several friends I hadn't for awhile, and got some important things done. I'm almost ready for a few days off . . . but not till after I do a few more things:

iron Cody's shirts (yes, he can do it, but I do it in exchange for him doing jobs I like even less, like taking out the trash and taking the Christmas tree downstairs)
pack
highlight my hair (maybe . . . it looks OK like it is, too!)
clean out the refrigerator
finish getting Nebraska Family Times bills ready to send . . .

YIKES! I need to make another list!

"The Sky is not Blue"

2009-01-08T21:07:00.002-06:00

This phrase is code between Tim and I for, "Morgan is in a 'mood' and will disagree with anything you say, even if you talk about the color of the sky."

Our family has been reading our Chronological Bibles together every evening, and tonight Morgan was in a 'mood.' She didn't like how the Bible was written (although she did agree that if mistakes were made they were made by the men who put the Bible together, not by God!) and argued with me about, well . . . everything I said!

In the midst of the "discussion" Tim looked at me and mouthed "the sky is not blue today!" and we shared a private smile. Some days it feels like it's US (Tim and I) against THEM (the teenagers/aliens inhabiting our home)!

Messy Room

2009-01-08T18:25:00.002-06:00

The difference between our children amazes me, and I've heard other moms say the same if they have more than one child. I have not decided (and it's probably not a situation in which a definite "decision" can be made) if the differences in Cody and Morgan are because of birth order, their sex, or their personalities. It's probably a combination of all three!

One of the biggest contrasts between our children is the state of their rooms. Morgan's is CHAOS and Cody's is very neat. Once in awhile we make Morgan clean her room (for the most part it stays a mess but once in awhile it just needs to be clean . . . mostly so people don't see it and think badly of Tim and I and our parenting!), and within a few hours she can have it in a very acceptable state of cleanliness.

HOWEVER . . . within a surprisingly short time after friends go home (the most common reason we "make" her clean it) . . . it's a total disaster again!

What is amazing is that Morgan very rarely loses anything . . . she's never without clean clothes . . . she always can find both of the pair of shoes she wants to wear . . . never loses her homework . . . some days it drives us crazy, and I don't see how she can study or relax or even sleep in the room . . . but she always can. And . . . there are almost always at least three animals (both dogs and at least one cat) sleeping in her room with her.

I wonder what her roommates at college will say? They might just transform her into a neat-nick!

So Much for that Deductible . . .

2009-01-04T18:42:00.002-06:00

I think everyone kind of dreads the beginning of the year because insurance deductibles reset and, at least for a while, we have to pay for 100% of doctor visits, tests, etc. We have very good insurance, but it's still kind of a bummer when we have to pay "full price" until the deductible is me.

Morgan came down with a sore throat, headache, sore neck, etc. on . . . January 2nd. I had the feeling she should see the doctor--it was almost the weekend (kids always seem to get sicker over the weekend), they start school again on Tues. and I didn't want her to miss school, and we're heading to Denver to the Stock Show in a few weeks, so I didn't want her to have a lingering illness.

The strep test came back negative, but the doctor decided to put her on antibiotics anyway as her other symptoms suggested a bacterial infection. Thankfully the antibiotics were just a few dollars . . . and she's feeling much better already.

Maybe a doctor's visit so early in the year means we won't have to go any more this year? We can only hope. :-)

Bad Week

2009-01-04T18:29:00.002-06:00

Know how sometimes bad things seem to happen all at once? We had a week like that two weeks before Christmas.

On Monday we found out that a good friend had been killed in a farm accident. Wednesday we found out that good friends were having marital problems. Thursday a good friend told me that her (barely!) 15-year old daughter was (GULP) pregnant! Then Friday, a very good friend collapsed and died, totally unexpectedly.

I still do not understand (and probably never will) why all of these events happened, and I don't know why they all had to happen right before Christmas (every one of those things is hard enough to cope with any time of year, but I always think it's more difficult right before Christmas) . . .

When we went to the visitation of one of the men who died (he was only in his 40's, has two kids still in high school), his wife looked at us and said, through her tears, "Do not ever, ever, take anything for granted!" I guess that is one lesson that we all need to be reminded of.

The unexpected pregnancy totally shocked my kids; they knew the girl years ago. I hope and pray that it brings home to my kids something Tim and I have been telling them for years--doing something they shouldn't (not "just" sex, but drinking, texting while driving, cheating, etc., etc., etc) even "just one time," can have life-long consequences. I pray that my friend and her daughter will make the best choices for the baby and themselves! I'm thankful that they are honoring the life of the baby and didn't take what might seem the "easy" way out in abortion.

The pregnancy also reminded Tim and I that we need to talk to Cody and Morgan about these things, even when it's difficult and maybe embarassing (for them and for us!). We need to tell them in no uncertain terms what our beliefs are and what is "right." Of course, that is no guarantee that our kids will do (or not do) what we want them to . . . it's a rather scary part of being a parent to realize that no matter how much we talk to our kids, how much we check up on them, and so on . . . they are becoming independent and making their own decisions. We pray they are wise decisions, and pray that we are setting a good example for them.

Christmas

2009-01-04T18:20:00.004-06:00

Our family had a very nice Christmas, and hope your family did also! We decided to give minimum gifts this year, but obviously the gifts were given with much thought and consideration of the receiver. We spent a day shopping, as a family, the week before Christmas. Tim and I shopped for a new comforter for our bed, but couldn't find one that we liked even a little bit. We were THRILLED that Cody and Morgan got us one, and it's perfect! It's been so cold the last few nights, we've put it to good use.

The best part of Christmas was attending church together on Christmas Eve. I have attended "our" church since I was about 16 years old, and the Christmas Eve service is still much like it was then. My favorite part of the service is at the end.

The pastor lights his candle from one at the altar, and lights candles of several ushers, who then light the candles of the member at the end of every row. As members light their candles from the candle of the person next to them, the lights are turned down, and eventually the only light comes from the candles (I think the fire marshall would be appalled!). Then . . . we sing "Silent Night."

The familiar music, the candles, being with friends and family . . . it brings tears to my eyes every year, and even now, just thinking about it. It is beyond belief to me that Someone would love me enough to send His Son to the earth, as a baby in a manger, to forgive little old me of my sins. It's just overwhelming. It's one tradition I hope never changes.

Happy New Year!

2009-01-04T18:11:00.002-06:00

WOW--it's been a long time since I posted! Sorry about that . . . time has just FLOWN lately . . . it seems like it should still be about September.

I have several resolutions for the New Year, and in posting them here I'll hopefully be motivated to keep them, so I don't have to admit here that I didn't! My first resolution is to do Bible Study every day. In the last few months I've realized that I've gradually spent less and less time in Bible Studay and nurturing my spiritual life. It seems like I go through these phases every year or so--I'm very faithful about spending time with God, and then gradually spend less and less time doing so. It's so easy to let "life" get in the way! But when I DO spend that time doing what I know is most important, my life is just so much better, in so many ways.

Right now as a family we're reading the Chronological Bible. It is fascinating to me to read the events of the Bible in the order in which they occurred--which (a surprise to me!) isn't the order in which the books are put together. I feel like in the last few years our family has gotten away from spending time with God, and I'm so glad we're doing so again now.

Another goal is to exercise every day. I'm not holding myself to a complicated routine or a long time of exercise, just doing "something" every day.

A fun goal is to take a photo every day. It might not be posted every day, but they'll all be posted eventually. One of my sisters is joining me in doing this, and I hope my other sister will too. I'm waiting for her reply to my email! We decided to make a blog with our photos, and you can find it at http://www.pictureadayin2009.blogspot.com.

Another fun goal is to learn/do something new every month. This month I'm going to make homemade pasta with homemade pesto sauce. One month I want to learn how to tie a knot in a cherry stem with my tongue.

I'll keep you updated here!

And another Homecoming Picture

2008-10-20T01:28:00.002-05:00

For some reason the computer won't let me post more than one picture at a time . . . so here is Morgan, in purple, and one of her friends, ready for Homecoming!

Homecoming Pictures

2008-10-19T20:41:00.009-05:00

After looking back at previous posts I realized--and a friend "gently reminded" me--that I hadn't posted any pictures from Homecoming! Here is one of Cody and his girlfriend.

Good Enough

2008-10-19T19:36:00.002-05:00

I know I have not posted in -- YIKES! -- over a month! Part of that is because of my perfectionistic tendencies--if I can't do "it" (whatever "it" is) perfectly, I tend to not want to do it. I'm trying hard to get over this, because as you can see by the long time between blog entries, sometimes it prevents me from doing anything at all.

Tim and the kids are working very hard to get ready for the cattle sale, which is the weekend before Thanksgiving. There are several people helping them. Today I was going to go to town and get sandwich stuff, and make sandwiches for them for lunch. Tim encouraged me to just get pizza, saying it would be easier for me and probably cost about the same. At first, that went against my grain . . . "I" wanted to "make" something for them to eat!

But then I thought about it. It's Sunday, and I wanted some time to relax! No one would truly notice if I "made" lunch or just picked it up. They would just be glad to eat! So I took his suggestion and got pizza. They loved it just as much as they would have liked sandwiches . . . and I'm sure that between now and the sale I'll have plenty of opportunities to actually "make" something for them to eat.

Since I was on a roll of doing things "good enough," I decided to make cookies for the guys (and girls) for an afternoon snack. I thought (very briefly) about making them from scratch . . . but when I was at the grocery store I found already mixed dough on sale, so decided to use that. Everyone LOVED the cookies . . . and I joked that the recipe was from my favorite Aunt Betty . . . Crocker, that is!

Now, there are things that need to be done 100%, as perfect as we can do them . . . but analyze what you're going to do . . . and if "good enough" is good enough, save "perfect" for the things that really matter.

Shopping

2008-09-14T21:09:00.002-05:00

Yesterday Morgan and I went shopping for a homecoming dress. She's going with several friends who are girls . . . I'm not ready for her to want to go with a boy yet! It's nice that she's at the age where she can shop by herself, mostly. I went to Christopher and Banks (yes, an "old lady" store) while she checked out Maurices. When I met her a little while later, she had several dresses to try on.

She found several that fit and I approved of, but before the decision could be made, a friend had to be consulted. I took a picture of Morgan with her cell phone, sent it to her friend, and while she was waiting for her friend's reply, I also sent a picture on my cell phone, to Tim. Luckily both her friend and her dad approved, and so she bought the dress! Next stop, shoes . . . and again she found a pair very quickly.

She is so excited to go to the dance, and I'm so thankful she's enjoying high school. I'll post a picture of her in her dress, next week.

"Mom, You're Messing up My Makeup!"

2008-09-14T20:59:00.002-05:00

That was Morgan's response to my good-bye hug as she left for school a few weeks ago. I guess that's just another sign of her growing up--makeup is more important than a hug. Cody also reluctantly accepts my hugs . . . I think he's learned that it's easier just to accept and hug me back than to fight it . . . he knows I'm going to get a hug before he leaves the house, no matter how long it takes!

A few weeks ago I spent several days with my sister and niece, who is seven years old. In contrast to Cody and Morgan, Logan is more than willing to give her Aunt Shelly LOTS of hugs! And, also in contrast to my own children, Logan was more than excited to sit my ME in the restaurant, hold my hand while we looked around the State Fair, and talk with me about anything I wanted to talk about.

While I'm happy to see my kids grow up, sometimes I really miss those "little kid" moments of getting hugs. Thankfully, Morgan isn't completely done giving me hugs . . . if she doesn't have make-up on.

Kids

2008-08-24T17:52:00.003-05:00

Now for a "kid" update . . .

Cody and Morgan started school last week. It was kind of hard to see them go . . . it's so nice to have them home during the summer. I know Tim misses them even more in that way as they help at the ranch almost every day during the summer.

But it was also neat to see their excitement--yes, EXCITEMENT!--at going back to school. Cody is a junior, and I know he's looking ahead to finishing high school and (GULP!) going off to college. He very much dreaded going back to school in the school they used to attend, and I'm so thankful he's excited about seeing his friends and learning not only in the classroom, but about "real life" too.

Morgan is a freshman(woman) :-) and she, too, was excited to go back. She picked out her clothes and accessories with all the care I remember from when I went back to school. In the school district the kids transfered to last year, Morgan was in a grade school. She had a very hard time adjusting to the new school and the fall was a tough time for her and for her mom and dad! This year, she knows many of the kids in the high school and is looking forward to her classes, so I'm optimistic it will be a much, much better experience.

It's sobering to realize that our children will only be living at home for a few more years (although I certainly wouldn't want them living here till they were 35!). Tim and I have been their main influence for what, when they were born, seemed like many, many years . . . but now that they're almost grown up, seems to have just flown by. I pray that they learned the "right" lessons from us . . . and that they will carry those values and lessons into their "grown up" life. We have been so very blessed with our children adn I pray that the next few years, while they're still at home (sometimes, anyway) we can continue to teach them positive life lessons.

Newspaper Editor!

2008-08-24T17:45:00.004-05:00

Several weeks ago, I mentioned that I'd made the agreement to purchase the Nebraska Family Times newspaper. We (the current owner) and I decided that the purchase date will now be Sept. 12th.

I'm soooo excited . . . and a little nervous . . . about this new venture! One of my goals is to provide families with information they can use. I need to come up with a brief tagline that describes the newspaper . . . something with the words "conservative" and "family" and "Christian" in it. That's just one thing on a long list, that I need to do. I will be starting a Nebraska Family Times blog, that will chronicle this new venture, and provide information that may be outdated by the time the next issue of the newspaper comes out (the newspaper is published monthly).

Yesterday I gave a talk in David City. The talk was about determining priorities and setting goals. At one point I mentioned that I had a new priority--learning how to run a newspaper, the Nebraska Family Times. I saw one lady react to that with surprise. After the talk, she told me that she'd been getting the paper for several years, enjoyed it . . . and that her husband, who is a chiropractor, might want to advertise in the paper! She might also write for the paper.

Right now I just need a day or two (at least!) to get stuff organized--contacts, to-do's, ideas, and so on . . . and on . . . and on. . . I'll probably never have those uninterrupted days, but somehow, it will all get done. I know it will be a steep learning curve at first, but it will be interesting, and fun, and hopefully something that will really benefit the families it reaches.

Time Flies!

2008-08-24T17:32:00.002-05:00

WOW--the last month + has just flown by! I didn't realize how behind I was in blogging until a friend e-mailed and pointed out how long it had been since I'd posted . . . and I could hear her toe tapping disapprovingly in the background. That was about four days ago . . . (sorry Suze!)

It seems like I've been working on several projects, forever! One is writing the curriculum for the midweek classes at our church. Midweek takes place on Wed. evenings, for grades 3-6. Grades 7 and 8 are in Confirmation classes, and the pastors take care of those classes. I'm on the Board of Education at our church, and was talking to the pastor about the midweek classes. We talked about curriculum, and he mentioned how what they'd used last year was very expensive and the teachers didn't really like it. Somehow . . . I volunteered to write a new curriculum for this year! I enjoy projects like this, and was excited about setting it up how *I* wanted to.

I decided to take lessons and stories directly from the Bible; I never really liked the focus in what seems to be most Sunday School and midweek classes, on one aspect of a Bible Story--you know, Jonah was swallowed by a whale (but why was he running from God? I think THAT is the real lesson!). Or the focus on crafts or games. Fun, yes . . . but what does glueing a cotton ball beard on Moses really teach us about what he did? (and how many moms dread their child bringing home yet another "craft" project -- very little of which was creative or actually done by their child)?

I certainly don't mean to criticize the companies that put out curricula . . . and I'm forever greatful to the teachers who have that ability as teaching kids is definitely NOT a gift of mine. I just hope that what I've written will teach kids to go to the Bible for the answers they need in life situations.

ANYWAY . . . I just can't seem to finish the last few classes. I have the ideas, they're written out, and I just need to get them typed up and to the pastor for his approval (he liked the classes I've already turned in, so I think he'll approve these too). I guess like the ad, I have to "JUST DO IT!"

My New Business Adventure

2008-07-18T21:02:00.002-05:00

A few weeks ago I told you about a business proposal I'd received. Today I'm ready to tell you about it, since I decided to accept the proposal.

For several years I've written for the Nebraska Family Times newspaper. It's a monthly newspaper, full of Christian news. You can check it out at www.nebraskafamilytimes.net

The owner of the paper is a wonderful woman named Vyckie. She is raising seven cute, friendly, intelligent children, and she even homeschools them! Vyckie decided that to spend more time with her children and their education, she had to give up the paper. She asked me to buy it and take over!

At first I was overwhelmed with her proposal and thought "no way"! But as I prayed about it and considered it, I gradually came to see it as a great and timely opportunity for me and my family. Several events showed me that this was something that would be an answer to prayers, and the perfect long-term "project" for me.

So, as of August 11, 2008, I will be the owner of a new newspaper! Vyckie has done a fantastic job with the paper, and she has answered hundreds of MY questions in getting started. I"m so thankful to have met her several years ago, and hope I can do as good a job as she has. If any readers would like a FREE three-month trial subscription, please e-mail me! You'll enjoy the Nebraska Family Times and find useful, friendly information throughout the paper. I will be setting up a blog within the next few weeks, tracking my new adventure. I'll let you know the name of it when it's ready for public view.

I look forward to this new quest!

Summer Eating

2008-07-18T20:52:00.003-05:00

I just love summer eating! I don't like cooking in the summer--I want to make fancy salads but my family doesn't really like a lot of raw veggies or fruits.

There are, however, some meals we just can't get enough of. One is BLT's--Bacon, Lettuce, and Tomato sandwiches. There is a family business within a few miles of us. They grow tomatoes, sweet corn, cucumbers, melons, peppers, green beans, and so on. We are always excited to see their trucks out for the first time--and that happened last week! Our favorites are tomatoes, tomatoes, tomatoes! I like to cut them up and eat them with sugar; Tim prefers them with salt.

Today we got all the fixings for BLT's and tonight I fried a bunch of bacon, cut up several tomatoes, and chopped the lettuce. I don't plan on "cooking" anything else all weekend--we'll just enjoy BLTs. Now, Morgan doesn't like "L" or "T" but she'll eat tacos--the fixings which are similiar to BLT's with lettuce and seasoned hamburger. For that matter, she can have a taco salad--except for the part about not liking lettuce . . . :-)

A few years ago I found a recipe for what has become a family favorite; BLT Salad. Fry some bacon (save a few tablespoons of the bits at the bottom of the pan). Cook some pasta. Toss with the bits from the bottom of the pan and a Tablespoon or so of lemon juice. Toss with the bacon, chopped tomatoes, lettuce, and a little bit of mayo. And that's it! The salad only stays fresh for a few days, so don't make a huge amount at one time. ENJOY!

I got a bunch of fresh fruit earlier this week, and have it all cleaned and cut up, so we can (in theory at least) go to the fridge for a healthy snack any time. I'm still tempted by chocolate . . . but made the deal with myself that I had to have a bowl of nectarines or strawberries first. The fruit usually eases the craving for something sweet.

The summer produce just does not compare with out-of-season-from-hundreds-of-miles-away stuff! I hope you have the chance to enjoy some summer produce too.

Long Time No Blog!

2008-07-18T20:44:00.002-05:00

Last time I made a blog entry I was at home by myself. It seems like a long time ago already! The kids had a good week at the show and so did Tim. I didn't get all of his office cleaned . . . was planning to finish that week but am STILL trying to get back to it. I need to plan a 3-4 hour block of time to do so.

It was nice to have a few days by myself! I felt a bit more relaxed when they all got home, and good about what I'd accomplished while they were gone, although I do wish I'd done more.

The week of the 7th was the county fair. Morgan showed her sheep and cattle, and was the Grand Champion Intermediate Showman(woman) for both species. Her heifer, Zell, was also the Grand Champion Breeding Heifer. Cody's steer was rather mean but Cody did a great job showing him. He sold at the sale on Sunday, so he's now in the great feedyard in the sky. We had a successful fair and made some good memories.

All By Myself!

2008-06-29T18:46:00.002-05:00

Tim and the kids left today to go to the National Shows in Kansas City. I didn't go for several reasons . . . I need to work, and I'll be feeding the sheep and dogs. Many of the events Morgan will take part in are not "public" events--she'll be giving a speech about cloning, judging, and so on, so I wouldn't be able to watch anyway. The kids have promised me that they will tell me if they want me to be at these events, and I trust them to do so.

My big project is to organize/clean Tim's office. Paperwork is NOT his strong point, so hopefully I can get it organized so that it's easier for him to keep track of what he needs to do and find what he needs to when he needs to.

I'm also planning to exercise and take some time for Bible Study. I had a very interesting business proposal last week, completely out of the blue. I'm very carefully considering it--it's a very exciting opportunity, but I do not want to take it on until and unless I'm sure it's right.

It's hard to not be with Tim and the kids all the time . . . yet it's very good for me to have some time alone to relax and refresh myself. And I know Tim appreciates his time with just the kids, too. It's good for them to have that time with their dad. I'm thankful he's such a good dad and willing to spend that much time with them!

Getting Old

2008-06-25T15:20:00.004-05:00

I guess I'm getting old. Yesterday, mid-morning, my back started to hurt. It got worse and worse, and by mid-afternoon I could hardly walk. About 8:00 I gathered phones (cell and cordless home phone), water, medicine, Bible study book and book I've been reading, and everything else I thought I'd need, and crawled into bed. I took some muscle relaxants and pain relievers and hoped to sleep all night and feel good enough in the morning to go to work.

At about 11:00 PM I was rudely awakened . . . by the smoke alarms blaring! They stopped blaring after about 5 seconds, and I couldn't smell any smoke, and hadn't cooked all day, so thought it was just a glitch.

Until they went off again a few minutes later . . . and then again . . . and then again, when I had enough time to try to find the instruction manual and see if there was a troubleshooting guide to "what to do when the smoke alarms won't stop going off for no reason." It took a few minutes to figure out how to roll over and get myself out of bed . . . and a few more minutes to hobble to my office to find the manual . . . and they were still going off, and I was still in pain . . . FINALLY the alarms stopped.

I hobbled back to bed (where the beagle was trembling with fear at all the noise) and drifted off to sleep . . . only to be awakened again about 4 AM by the same thing. I was getting slightly irritated by this time, to put it mildly . . . dragged a chair over (I'm sure THAT was good for my back!) and took the batteries out of two alarms . . . and they kept blaring! I just crawled back into bed and gave up . . .

I still don't know why they did that all night . . . perhaps because I was planning to at least try to go to work this morning, and God knew that wasn't a good plan so he added exhaustion to pain, knowing I couldn't work through both.

Until about a year ago I'd NEVER had back pain, and considered myself blessed because of that. (The episode last year started with dumping a bucket of cow feed into the bunk, and I've never been asked to do that again, haha!). Now I guess it's going to be something I'll have to be aware of . I do know I need to get into better shape, and this is going to spur me on to do that . . . when I feel better of course!

Tim and the kids are in Iowa at a cattle show, so I'm home alone . . . and that is not a bad thing, although it would be nice to have them home to fetch all those little things that are "big" things when every step hurts.

I know many people live with much worse pain, constantly, and this is very minor compared to that. I'm so thankful that missing a day of work doesn't mean I have to choose between medication and groceries, or that missing a day means I'm in danger of being fired from my job . . . I'm blessed that my medicine cabinet has plenty of pain meds and there's a nice ice bag in the freezer! (It freezes the ice in little round cubes, so it's easy to concentrate the cold right where it feels the best).

Hurting makes me appreciate my general good health all the more!

Loosening the Apron Strings

2008-06-19T18:32:00.003-05:00

I think all moms know that at some point, the apron strings need to loosen . . . gradually . . . a little bit at a time . . . sslllooooowwwwwwlllllyyyyy . . .

Lately I have noticed the apron strings between Morgan and I loosening a bit faster than I'm ready for. I'm not sure that I'm ready. As you know from previous posts, Cody has been sick with mono and so home all the time. It's been a nice time for "bonding" (as much as a teenage boy can bond!) between Cody and I.

Cody being home all day means Morgan has been doing more at the ranch with the cattle. She's been there, with Tim, all day, and she's taken over a lot of Cody's responsibilities. The last few days, when she comes home for lunch or at the end of the day, she's been rather . . . cool . . . to me. This is something I never thought would happen with my sweet little girl!

We've always been very close, but now when she comes home she doesn't call out "Hi Mom!" to me. She heads straight to her beagle or the refrigerator . . . instead of straight to me for a hug. When she leaves, she yells "Bye mom!" and heads out the door without waiting for a reply or a hug. I, of course, catch her before she drives off and demand my hug as house rules dictate no one leaves the house without a hug for mom!

She used to tell me every detail of what everyone said and did (including the cattle) when she was at the ranch. Now she recounts the day only to my pointed questions . . . and her responses are along the lines of, "Fine." "Nothing." "Not really." "No." "Yes." all punctuated with a huge sigh. In other words, "Mom, it is a tremendous burden on me to have to reply to your inane questions to which the answers should be obvious. Please, quit annoying me."

Paradoxically, she is quite strident in her requests of me (and my failure to meet her high standards in doing so). Every day she asks, "So, mother dear, what have you lovingly planned, selectively shopped for, and carefully prepared for my dining pleasure?" OK, back to real life; she asks, in a rather crabby way, "So what's for lunch?"

My reply could be, "Darling daughter, I have imported the finest food you can imagine. You have your choice of lobster, caviar, a hamburger, ribeye prepared medium rare, baked, mashed, or hash brown potatoes, salad with or without dressing, or anything else your dear heart could desire!" and her reply would be, "That doesn't sound good. Don't you know I don't like lobster, caviar, a hamburger, or anything else you could even dream of making me? You will never live up to my expectations, Mother."

Perhaps God makes it easier for us to untie those apron strings by making kids moody, tempermental, and with an attitude as big as the sky.

Thankfully, He also gives me the early morning moments when Morgan is asleep and I can hug her as tightly and for as long as I want to (she's a heavy sleeper), and whisper "I love you Morgan!" and hear her whisper back from deep in dreamland, "I love you too, mom!"

When He's Sick, He Can't Run Away From Me!

2008-06-16T16:40:00.002-05:00

There aren't many benefits of having a sick kid . . . but one of them is that he's too tired/wiped out to run away from me when I try to talk to him.

He's spent most of his time on the couch . . . reading, watching TV, talking on the phone, texting on his phone . . . When Tim and Morgan are not home, there are times when he's been bored enough to actually let me sit next to him on the couch (and NOT run away!) when we're having a snack or lunch. Sometimes, we actually hold a civilized conversation . . . one which does not end with one of us stomping away in anger or frustration.

I hope this lasts beyond his illness . . .

Father's Day

2008-06-16T15:11:00.003-05:00

It was a beautiful day yesterday! Warm, sunny, and just a little wind. The day didn't start out so good; at 6:45 AM we woke up to rain and hail! The hail was tiny, and lasted for just a few minutes. Tim had to work for much of the day . . . cows in heat need to be AI'd!

I made steak and scallops for supper, along with veggies and cheese-filled tortellini. I had some timing issues in getting everything done at the same time (or almost the same time), but it turned out yummy and everyone enjoyed it. It was the first time I'd ever made scallops. I browned them in butter with a little chopped garlic, garlic salt, and thyme. (I don't know why I picked thyme; a recipe I planned to follow called for tarragon, but we didn't have any of that.) Everyone enjoyed the scallops, so I'll make them again . . . tarragon is on my grocery list so I'll follow that recipe next time. It was nice to spend the evening together as a family.

I am so blessed to have Tim for my kids' father! When they were born, he told me that I'd have to take care of them until they were out of diapers, and they would spend free time with him after that. He was a little nervous holding them when they were babies (although he was always glad to cuddle with them if I put them on his chest), and changed maybe 2 or 3 diapers, total, for both kids. I didn't mind diapers, and Tim helped in so many other ways (including working hard enough that I didn't have to work outside the home) that I never expected him to change them.

Since the kids have been out of diapers, they've spent more and more and more time with Tim. He takes them to shows, sales, and to look at cattle in far off places . . . and as they've gotten older and could help at the ranch, they've all enjoyed working together (most of the time . . . remember, they're teenagers so sometimes hormones get in the way of common sense . . . ). Since we moved to the country a little more than three years ago, they spend time after school helping Tim, and all day most days during the summer.

They are so blessed to have such a close relationship with him! He's teaching them about life, managing the ranch, business, and so many more things. The most valuable gift we can give our children is our time . . . and Tim gives soooo much of his time! He is willing to put in many extra hours for them . . . a few weeks ago we took Morgan to a sheep show on a hot and humid Friday night. I know Tim would have liked to have been at home in the air-conditioned house, watching an episode of Law and Order . . . but he took the time and effort to go to the show with Morgan.

I don't think they realize how blessed they are to have such a loving dad . . . I don't know if any of us realized as children what a blessing loving, caring parents are (to anyone who didn't have "good" parents . . . I'm sorry. . . you were cheated out of one of the greatest relationships on earth. I hope you find those special relationships in other relatives or friends!).

And to anyone who experienced Father's Day without his or her father because he has died, I'm sorry. I can't imagine how difficult Father's Day is for you. I pray for God to give you peace and good memories.

My dad taught me more than I will ever realize . . . as I get older I realize how valuable his example, and lessons, and love, were and are. Thanks, Dad!

Sick Kid, Sick Mom

2008-06-13T17:54:00.003-05:00

I remember having the throw-up flu when Cody and Morgan were very little--you know, the "watch-their-every-move-so-they-don't-drown/poison themselves/electrocute themselves" stage. Tim was out of town, and it was just plain miserable to have to keep track of them and be sick at the same time!

I woke up with a fever and headache this morning, and it was so nice to be able to just eat a little bit, take some medicine, and go back to sleep. I didn't have to worry about anything (except the darn phone that wouldn't quit ringing!!). Quite a contrast from years ago.

Advice to moms with young children--if you don't feel well, do all you can to find someone to take care of your kids for the day! If this is not possible, give yourself permission to do all things the easy way. Cereal for each meal (unless your husband will get take out for supper). Forget laundry and cooking. Let the kids watch movies alllll day--their brains will not be permanently damaged from just one day of that! Let them "take care" of you by rubbing your back, feet, legs, or hands (they'll enjoy doing it even more if you let them use lotion). If they like to play "waitress", order simple meals like soda and crackers. If all else fails, bribe them! Or, assign chores every time they wander away from where you've told them they could be.

And ALL moms--if you know a friend is sick, offer to take care of her kids for the day, or even for just a few hours! The sick mom will be forever greatful to you for coming to her aid in times of need.

Cody is still very tired from his mono. One of the phone calls today was from the doctor's office, checking to see how he was doing. Since he told them his throat still hurts, the doctor has prescribed an antibiotic. He did go see his cattle, very briefly . . . but now he's asleep again.

Since he'll be mostly at home for more than another week, today I ordered him a Chronological Bible--one that has all the Bible readings in the order in which they were written. I have a Chronological Bible and I'm really enjoying it--reading the events in the order in which they happened has given me a new view of the Bible. I (jokingly) told him that he has to start with the January 1st reading and catch up by the end of next week . . . but I don't think I'll hold him to that! He's bored, though, so this will give him something constructive to do. Besides text on his phone, haha!

Texting from the Doctor's Office

2008-06-11T17:09:00.004-05:00

Cody's abdominal pain continued, so yesterday I took him to the doctor. Cody is for the most part very healthy, and he was not happy that he had to go to the doctor. He was even more unhappy when the nurse said she had to draw blood--not a finger prick, but from a vein in his arm.

He was apprehensive about the procedure, but rejected my offer to hold his hand, or even stand near the table he was sitting on, when the blood was drawn! He did, however, have his cell phone in a death grip . . . I guess that was his way of keeping his friends close and getting their comfort.

Between the doctor and nurse going in and out of the exam room, waiting for test results, and so on, he was texting his friends about his "ordeal." I added to his "torment" by continually asking him, "Who are you texting now? Tell them your mom says "HI". " He showed me the text; "My weird mom says to tell you "HI." What was funny was that his friends then texted back, "Tell your mom I said "HI" too!"

After an exam by the doctor and his reading the results of the blood tests, the verdict was in . . . Cody has mono! He said he would have rather had appendicitis (which was a possible diagnosis, given his symptoms) because he could have had it taken out and been better in a few days. However, the doctor put him on a very reduced schedule for at least two weeks. The doctor also said he needed to avoid all type of contact sports, because his liver and spleen are inflamed.

The doctor likened his inflamed spleen to a water balloon--"sloshy" and unstable. He said Cody should avoid anything that could cause an injury to it, like "sledding down a hill and running into a tree." The doctor and Cody then spent a few minutes laughing and listing activities he should avoid. Cody suggested "belly flop contests". The doctor countered with "bull riding" and so on. The doctor was great--he talked to Cody (not just me), answered his questions, and explained the reason for the need for rest.

Thankfully, there are no cattle shows for a few weeks, and since school is out, we don't have to worry about that. If he had to get mono, this was really a good time to get it! He's on steroids for his inflamed liver and spleen, but otherwise no medications.

Cody was glad to take it easy today . . . I'm afraid it will get more difficult as he feels better, but for now I'm thankful for a cooperative patient. He is watching a movie right now; I just offered to watch it with him, rub his back, or just sit by him . . . his reply was, "Mom, you can go do your own work. It's OK." I guess his cell phone is good enough company. Sometimes, however, I miss the demands of a sick child for hugs and just being by his mom!

Rate Your Pain, Kid!

2008-06-09T14:47:00.002-05:00

No, that's not what I say to the kids when I'm punishing them, or when they complain about how "mean" I am (sometimes it's a parent's job to be mean, but that's another post!).

Nurses are trained to ask patients who are in pain, to rate their pain. This gives us a way to assess the severity of the pain, as well as how effective medication or other pain-relief measures are. It's natural for me to ask the kids (and my husband, and my parents, and my in-laws!) to rate their pain when they are having pain. (If you want to use this technique, ask the person how bad the pain is on a scale of 1-10, with 1 being "very little or no pain" and 10 being "the worst pain I can imagine." A rating of '17' means they're not taking the pain scale seriously!)

Cody came home Saturday evening not feeling good, and still wasn't feeling well when he and Morgan left for the show on Sunday. By mid-morning Sunday he was feeling so rotten he went to the pickup and slept there until Morgan was done showing, and then I took him home.

I've found that it's as hard to watch your children being sick when they're teenagers, as it is when they're little babies. When they're babies, they cannot tell you what is wrong, but they will accept any and all cuddling you'll give them. I remember many "sick" days spent rocking and cuddling with sick kids. Of course I don't like it when my children don't feel well, but there is something about being the only one who can comfort them in the midst of the flu or an ear infection.

Teenagers are very able to tell you exactly what's wrong . . . not that they are always willing to. Yesterday I heard "I can't tell what hurts . . . I just feel yukky . . . quit asking me! . . . I don't know how bad my pain is . . . I don't feel like giving it a number . . . " before I got the information that he had a bad headache, and his muscles and stomach hurt. Same thing this morning--stomach pain at a 6-7 rating, enough to get me to be a bit concerned that it was something serious. Thankfully, by the time I got home from work, and several hours after Cody had taken some medicine, he rated the pain a 3. Hopefully it is just a virus and will pass.

The hard part about having a teenage boy who is sick is that he most definitely does NOT want extra hugs, or cuddles, or even to have me near him. He's texting his girlfriend and other friends . . . I guess that is the teenage form of cuddling when you're sick!

Time to ask Cody to rate his pain again . . .

Parenting Pride

2008-06-09T14:10:00.003-05:00

There are many moments in parenting that are hard--beginning with the first days at home, often filled with crying and mysterious-looking diapers . . . and continuing into the teenage years when hormone surges the strength and unpredictability of tsunamis dominate some days.

Thankfully, there are also those sometimes unexpected moments that bring happy tears to a parent's eyes. I had several of those moments this weekend. As you recall from the previous post, Cody and Morgan were at a cattle show by themselves on Saturday. Yesterday, Tim and I went to watch Morgan show her heifer, Zell.

I had fun visiting with several "cattle show moms"--moms I rarely see outside of the cattle shows. One of them said to me, "I have to tell you what Cody said yesterday." My immediate thought was, "Oh oh! What smarty pants comment did he make to someone?" Thankfully, I was wrong. The mom told me how she'd driven onto the fairgrounds just as Cody and a friend were getting out of his truck. The mom pulled up by the boys, and asked them if she should go get them lunch. They replied that they had already eaten, and then Cody added, "And we fed our sisters, too!"

Maybe it sounds like a little thing . . . but (for you readers who do not have teenagers yet) it's a big deal for a sometimes selfish, usually self-centered teen to actually think to feed his sister (not that she would have starved without him feeding her). Making it even better was that I had NOT given him money, OR told him to "feed your sister"--he did it all on his own!

Another proud moment was watcing Morgan compete for and win Supreme Champion Junior Showman (woman!). First she showed against all the kids who showed a Simmental cow, and then she competed against the showmanship winners of all the other breeds. I could tell how hard she was working each time she was in the ring. Her heifer wasn't behaving the best, but Morgan kept calm and ultimately won! My eyes filled with tears of pride at her accomplishment when the judges announced her as the winner.

I treasure these moments . . . and pull them out of my memory during those "hormone tsunami," rolling-eyes-"mom-I-can't-BELIEVE-you'd-say/do-THAT" moments (and days)!

Spreading Their Wings and Cutting my (Apron) Strings

2008-06-07T16:42:00.004-05:00

Cody and Morgan are at a cattle show about 50 miles from here today. Going to a cattle show isn't anything unusual . . . in fact, between about February and November it's unusual if we do NOT go to a cattle show! However, this one is different.

Cody and Morgan are at the show . . . all by themselves. They left--just the two of them--before 7AM. I had the second day of my nursing workshop, and Tim has stuff to do at the ranch today. The kids wanted to go . . . so we let them. We figure that at some point we have to let them do it by themselves, and better to let them do so at a relatively close show, when the weather is good, and they can drive there on good roads.

It feels very strange to be "here," while they are "there" by themselves! I know it's a part of the process of them growing up, but it's still strange, after attending almost every cattle show with them for the last 9 or 10 years.

Cody and Morgan were getting along great last night as they were getting ready to go. Morgan was going to give a speech today, and Cody was helping her go over it. This morning, instead of his usual "Hurry up Morgan--what's taking you so long??? You're always late!" he was patient with her. He even let her drive his truck back to our home after they loaded her heifer on the trailer (which was hooked to the other truck).

It is reassuring to know where they are . . . and that there are other mothers and fathers at the show, mothers and fathers who will let us know if they're doing something they shouldn't be doing--after telling the kids themselves to STOP doing what they shouldn't be! The families that show cattle are like one big family--we all watch out for each other's kids, and I think all the kids feel comfortable going to any of the parents if they need something.

I'm so glad Cody and Morgan are 'friends' as well as siblings . . . they watch out for each other, and encourage each other (when they're not bickering with each other!). My relationship with my sisters was good when we were kids, and we're very close now. I pray Cody and Morgan will share the same type of relationship.

No More Babysitters

2008-06-07T16:30:00.003-05:00

Well, with kids age 14 and 16 we haven't needed babysitters for several years. We moved to the country a little over three years ago, and even though the kids were a bit young to stay by themselves then, we let them. Tim's mom and dad are only about 1/2 mile away, and we don't go out that much!

Yesterday I went to a nursing workshop. On the way there I was thinking about how nice it was not to have to worry about babysitters any more--first of all trying to find a good one, then the concern of whether or not they would show up on time, if they would have friends/boyfriends over while we were gone/ignore the kids/lose the kids/let the kids get hurt/take them somewhere they shouldn't . . . I can conjure up the wildest scenarios!

We were blessed with some wonderful babysitters when the kids were little. Three sisters lived just across the street from us, and most often if one couldn't babysit, one of the others could. As a bonus, their mom is a nurse, so we knew if there was an emergency expert help was very close. Another girl lived right next door. And of course Tim's mom was always available in a pinch.

My advice to moms whose kids are in the "babysitter" stage--ask around to get names of good sitters. Pay them well! Suggest that if they have time, they do the dishes or do light housework--then pay them better and tell them WHY you're paying them better! One of the best feelings I had when our kids were very young was coming home to a CLEAN house and sleeping kids, after an evening out with Tim. It was so nice to enjoy a clean house that evening, and get up to a clean house.

THANKS to Cody and Morgan's early babysitters--they might not remember you, but I sure do!

"I'm sorry, mom!"

2008-06-05T18:49:00.002-05:00

No, it wasn't one of the kids apologizing to me . . . but me, apologizing to my mom for something my sisters and I had done when we were little. I didn't realize how much she (so very patiently) put up with, with us, until I had to (not so patiently) deal with it in my kids!

Even from 400 miles away, through the phone line, I knew she was smiling. And maybe laughing at me just a little, tiny bit.

Personal Shortcomings

2008-06-05T15:32:00.008-05:00

I thought by this time in my life (earlier this year I celebrated the 18th anniversary of my 23rd birthday) I would have "it" (whatever "it" is) all "together" (whatever "together" means). If I was the ideal person I want to be, I would exercise every single day (cardio and weights). My clothes would be stylish and coordinated, even if I was just going to the grocery store. My hair and makeup would also be perfect, every day.

I would get up at 6 AM every day (actually, I have been doing that!) to do my Bible study, exercise, and prepare the meals for the day--including a full, hot breakfast.

I would be the "perfect mom" and cook well-balanced meals, every meal. I would never cook salmon for Morgan, thinking she ate it and LIKED it in at Applebees a few weeks ago (I really thought she did, but she swears she did not). I feel so bad for not realizing I was cooking something she really does not like!

I would be patient at all times . . . the house would be clean all the time (including the carpets) . . . I would not forget to send graduation cards and gifts would be bought and given on time.

My garden would be planted (and weeded).

I don't have a 5-year plan for my life . . . some days it feels like I don't have a 5 MINUTE plan for my life!

Does anyone else feel this way?

My Bible reading earlier this week said, "You can make many plans, but the Lord's purpose will prevail." (Prov. 19:21). I guess my plans to be an "ideal" person don't fit in with God's purpose at this time! I hate to think that I will never be an "ideal" person . . . but perhaps the things I do get done are more important than being "ideal".

I will continue to work at the things I've listed above, but also continue to pray that I will know God's purpose and follow His plan for my life.

"Look straight ahead, and fix your eyes on what lies before you. Mark out a straight path for your feet . . . don't get sidetracked." Proverbs 4:25-26

Seeing is Believing

2008-06-05T15:32:00.004-05:00

I always like to see who I'm "talking" to and reading about when I read a blog. Therefore, I'm posting this picture of our family so you can see who you're "talking" to and reading about when you check out this blog.

The picture was (obviously) taken on Christmas, 2007. This picture is special because of the circumstances under which we go it. We didn't even THINK of taking a family picture until, after a long day, we were all ready to go to bed. I quickly found the instruction book for the camera, so I could set the timer and be in the picture too.

Everyone was tired, so we only took TWO pictures . . . and miraculously, got this great one of the whole family, including Cadbury and Jenny.

Family Facts

2008-06-05T14:45:00.004-05:00

Burke Family, established 1989 when Tim and Shelly, high school sweethearts (awwwww) were married
Shelly, RN, graduated from Midland Lutheran College in Fremont, NE 1989; author of several books (see bottom of this page) and many magazine articles
Tim, owner of Burke Show Cattle, Genoa Nebraska (http://www.burkecattle.com/). Attended Colorado State University and The University of Nebraska, Lincoln
Cody, born 1991; intersts include cattle, 4-wheeling, FFA, friends
Morgan, born 1993; interests include any and all animals (past and present pets include hamsters, guinea pigs, ducks, cats, dogs, hermit crabs, cockatiels); showing cattle and sheep, reading, friends
Current family pets; Cadbury (chocolate lab), Jenny (Beagle); Lucky, Tiger, Sunshine (annoying cats); Shakespeare and Romeo (cockatiels {for sale!})
Family activities; going to cattle shows in Nebraska and throughout the Midwest
Favorite family meals; spaghetti, marinated pork chops on the grill
Things NOT served in the Burke home . . . mushrooms, chicken, tofu, coffee
Things only Shelly is able to do; clean up animal throw up (all other family members claim it would make THEM throw up if they had to do it), document ALL events through photographs (therefore I'm in very few photos!)
Greatest wish--cleaning elves who would come into our home daily to pick up the dishes, silverware, magazines, etc., etc., etc., that "not me!" leaves all over the house

How to Mortify Your Teenager

2008-06-05T14:20:00.002-05:00

Tell him that before he goes on his date this weekend, he needs to have "The Big Talk" with either you, or your husband. Inform him that this will take at least an hour, and he'll need to take notes, because there will be a 25-question quiz at the end, and he has to pass the quiz in order to go on his date this weekend. Ask him if he'd rather have "The Big Talk" with you, or your husband (giggle quietly at the terrified look on your husband's face when you say this!).

By this time your son's face will be bright red . . .but he will not dare stomp off or talk back to you, because he very much wants to go on the date with his girlfriend.

Leave the room, saying you have to find the books he needs to read before "The Big Talk." Tell him to stay where he is--he will, because he wants to go on the date . . .

Before he leaves for the afternoon, give him a big hug. He'll allow you to, so he can go on his date!

Time for Cool Changes

2008-06-05T13:45:00.003-05:00

It hit me a few months ago that our family was going through some big changes.

Cody, our 16 year old, can now drive anywhere (in theory anyway!) by himself, ending many years of driving him to every away-from-home event. I am no longer the main influence in his life . . . his dad is. Morgan, 14, has become involved in many more things--including showing sheep, school events, and joining the 4-H judging team. She's not a "girl" any more, but a young woman.

Both kids are much more independent--I don't know exactly where they are, or precisely what they're doing, every moment of every day, like I did when they were younger. They have their own point of view and can intelligently talk about current events and issues (we've had some intersting conversations and friendly debates about the presidential candidates). They're both looking ahead to college and what they'll do after that. They surprised me with a bright pair of Crocks for Mother's Day--and I didn't even hint that I wanted another pair!

For the most part I'm really enjoying this stage of family life. Oh, there are the occasional "hormone tsunamis" (Tim came up with that term and I think it's a perfect description of a teenager's mood swings), and the always-present low level of worry that I think every parent has about his or her kids for as long as we're parents. I realize that no matter what we've taught them, no matter how many times we've gone over seatbelts, no talking on cell phones while driving, and saying "NO!" (to so many things!), teens can be . . . well . . . short-sighted, overly confident, and just plain have a major brain fart. The scary part is that at the age they're at, a bad decision can lead to life-long negative consequences.

Back to changes . . . this is a time of life full of changes for me, too. Without having to focus on the kids 24/7 I'm looking ahead to what I want to do, and my long-term goals.

When I'm with a group of moms who are in this stage of life, between cooing and college, I've found that we share the same joys, concerns, and questions. It's always comforting to me to find that my kids aren't the only ones who can forget what I've asked them to do within 5 seconds of my asking (teenage Alzheimers, perhaps?), I'm not the only one who is wondering how to productively fill my newly-found free time (with things other than worry!), and my husband and I are not the dumbest parents ever, anywhere, at any time in world history (like our kids seem to believe!).

I hope this blog will be a place to share questions, concerns, advice, and encouragement about all aspects of the stage of motherhood between cooing and college. Of course, moms of younger kids are welcome, too! All moms are in this together--with the goal of raising healthy, happy, productive kids . . . with a minimum of therapy, trauma, and tears.